Herding Kittens

New Year's Resolutions

2012-01-15T09:34:00.002-05:00

I didn't want to talk about my New Year's resolutions at the very end of the year or the very beginning of the year, like all the other well-intentioned folks out there. I wanted to see how well I stuck to them for the first couple of weeks of the year to see how difficult they were going to be. Two out of the three haven't been difficult at all. One is more of a challenge, but I'm starting to internalize it a bit more every day.

Before I get into what the resolutions were, I'd like to mention that the last few years have been full of resolutions and change. My life today is definitely better than it was five years ago. I'm constantly honing my outlook on what is important and what is not. I have a long way to go on my journey, but it truly is the journey that is the most important thing. I am enjoying the experience, even when things do not turn out the way I would have liked them to.

This year's resolutions probably sound a lot like other people's resolutions:

Drop some weight

Declutter

Manage money better

On the 'drop some weight' front, I have been following the Atkin's diet since January 1. I've dropped around seven pounds at this point. While I would prefer to have gone over to a more raw and vegan diet, I know that Atkins works for me when it comes to weight management. My basic diet consists of animal protein and leafy green vegetables. No fruit, no grain, and virtually no processed foods (unless they are zero or near-zero carbohydrates). The toughest part for me is the 'no alcohol' thing. I had gotten rather used to my after-dinner drink or two most evenings. Giving that up alone probably explains a goodly portion of the weight loss, right? Surprisingly enough, I haven't really missed it. I didn't even mind turning down the wine being passed around at a dinner party last night.

On the 'declutter' front, I am trying to weed out a little something every day from my house. Every time I fill a trash bag I feel like dancing! I have decided to MASSIVELY thin out my book collection. That is going to be extremely difficult. However, I plan to keep my eyes on the prize, as it were. One of the major driving factors behind my decrappification movement is my plans for retirement. I would like to be able to move into a dwelling with half the space that I currently have without feeling cramped in the new space. That shouldn't be too big of a hardship. My current house is about 2100 square feet. I kind of have my eye on a home in another condo community a few miles from here. The houses are not THAT much smaller (nearly 1900 square feet), but they don't have basements to hide your junk in. All the junk would be more visible. Then again, so would the Merrimack River a mere 50 yards from the patio. They also have a garage, so no more cleaning snow off of my car in the winter.

The last big resolution of 'manage money better' is the biggest challenge for me. I have never been much of a saver. I grew up in a household of limited means. Once I started earning my own money I fell into some pretty bad mental habits around 'I deserve ___'. After years of struggling with debt, I had finally cleared the balance sheets a few years ago. I was about to turn things around and begin saving for things I wanted instead of going into debt to get them. Then my husband lost his job. Then our marriage fell apart. Not only is divorce expense for the employed party of divorcing couple, but my old mind set of 'I deserve ___' came back into play under the stress of the situation. Things had calmed down a great deal by early Fall 2011. I was starting to get a handle on my money again. Then a job change with a money flow change challenged my limited financial management skills. Then a situation with my ex-husband raised my stress levels again. I am starting to recover mentally from all of those changes and challenges. But I still find myself giving into my demon more often than is wise. I think I recognize the demon now. Hopefully, that will help me from listening to it. I make a really good living. There is no reason why I should be worrying about money. I create situations for myself that cause the worry.

Perhaps by Chinese New Year I will have that last major resolution full in hand.

In case the message wasn't clear before

2011-11-10T08:40:00.000-05:00

Seriously! Restraining order getting filed today.

Reminds me of someone

2011-11-05T12:19:00.000-04:00

A mix of a day, but ...

2011-10-25T15:31:00.002-04:00

My pain has been especially nasty of late, so I agreed to try an injection in my right hip directly over my inflamed bursa at the top of my TFL. If this works, I may do the left side as well. If I do it will be with another doctor. I'm finally fed up with my physiatrist. The woman is always late for our appointments (last week I waited 50 minutes!) She also doesn't even seem to read the notes from previous visits. Her focus is always on my low back, which is just one of my myriad pain issues. Her office staff seem virtually incompetent (constant screw ups with prescriptions and communications). And the overall focus of the practice just isn't warm and comforting. This is sad considering that people go there because they are in chronic pain. At the end of today's appointment, I filled out a form to have them fax my records to a new doctor. Hopefully, the next guy will be more focused on alleviating my pain and actually interacting with me as a patient.

Afterwards, I picked up some take out and watched "Attack the Block". What a fun little distraction of a movie. London ghetto kids/stoners take on alien invaders. Nick Frost has a supporting role that is humorous (of course).

Now I'm off to a massage appointment!

Happy Birthday to Me ;)

2011-10-25T08:13:00.001-04:00

"I'm feeling grateful for the small things today."

Don't Come Around Here No More

2011-10-24T20:36:00.001-04:00

Books worth reading (or listening to)

2011-04-03T08:17:00.004-04:00

As many of you know, I have come to prefer audiobooks to books one actually reads with the eyes. I spend about two hours each weekday in the car getting to and from my job. I used to love sitting in a chair or laying in bed with a book. Between the life-sucking commute and the general chaos of life, and the temptation of less mentally-involving pursuits (computers and video programming), I found that I was only 'reading' one or two physical books a year. However, I have been listening to at least twenty books a year. This is not a phenomenal number in comparison to some of my more bibliophilic friends. Still, that's probably more than the average American reads.

One of the more humorous aspects of this admission is that I have been the moderator of a book group for nearly a decade. Since we meet monthly (excepting July), we discuss eleven books per year. We have some basic criteria for the books we choose. First, the book should be easily available in paperback, though we sometimes will read a book recently released in hardcover if enough people are strongly interested in it. Secondly, we prefer books that are less than 400 pages in length. Any longer than that and it's proven to be difficult for most of us to get through the book in a month's time. We primarily read literary fiction, since it lends itself to discussion more easily than popular or mass market fiction. In addition, over the course of a year we typically pick up one classic book, something non-fiction, and one science fiction or fantasy themed book. That last one was initially in acquiescence to the tastes of the moderator, but the group as a whole now embraces the choice. We have had some really good discussions around the SF books we've read over the years.

Unofficially, we also try to make sure that the book is available in audio so that our poor beleaguered moderator can consume the book in the way most convenient to her. About once a year, we want to read something that is not available in audio format. I usually manage to get through the book by reading it while I'm on the exercise bike in the morning. Usually I keep up with current events by reading magazines while I exercise. So, if I have seemed under informed about a popular topic, let's shift all the blame to my book group's inconsiderate choice of book for a month. It couldn't possibly be that I spent more time reading MacWorld than The Week that month, or that I really just wasn't paying attention when Pakistan and India finally decided to go to war over Kashmir.

When I travel, I usually pop a book in my suitcase for the trip. I like having a page to look at while I'm on the airplane. It helps distract me a tiny bit from my discomfort with the entire idea of air travel. Over the years, I have tried to pack lighter and lighter for my trips. My body just can't carry heavy bags around any more, plus there's something kind of freeing about not hauling around a major pile of stuff while you're traveling.

As I was embarking on a recent trip, I was nearly done with the book that I was reading. I debated whether to take a second book with me. I decided to just pick up something at my destination when I finished, since I couldn't justify the space and weight of a second book in my luggage. As I was boarding the plane, I walked by passenger after passenger with their hands lovingly gripped to their thin little ereaders. A few of my friends evangelized on the wonders of their ereaders, but I didn't see the point for myself since I really didn't consider myself a 'reader' any more. I had become a 'listener'. After that trip, my subconscious mind got busy mulling over the various issues of reading, time, travel, and the like.

I am about to leave for my first ever overseas vacation. I'm going to Paris. Since I really don't want to carry anything unnecessary with me, what reading material to take has been a critical issue. Also, I will be on an airplane for at least seven hours in each direction. That's a lot of reading time (or sleeping time if I could manage to fall asleep on a plane). Those ereaders were starting to look more and more attractive as I thought about this trip. So, I gave in and bought myself a Kindle, primarily with the thought of using it when I traveled.

I decided that I would try to read something on the Kindle before the trip, to get used to the ereader experience. The best time to try it out seemed like bedtime each night. Decades ago, I would read at bedtime. Over the years, various things broke me of the habit. Back problems made it difficult for me to find a comfortable position to read in the bed that I shared with my husband. Plus, neither of us liked the other one reading in bed when we were trying to fall asleep. However, when the husband departed with the bed, I got a new highly comfortable bed. Low and behold, I actually could read in bed comfortably and without annoying anyone else. This turned out to be a boon on another level, since reading at bedtime seems to have significantly reduced my bouts of insomnia!

In the last month I have finished two novels on the Kindle. I am still listening to at least one book a month as well. My 'to read' list on Good Reads is growing as I expand my repertoire, adding books that are only available in ereader format. Whenever I stumble on a book now I look at what formats it's available in. My format of choice is still audio, with ereader format as a backup. I am still loathe to acquire books with actual pages in them unless absolutely necessary. If for no other reason than my house is full to the rafters with physical books, many of which I keep meaning to get around to reading. I'm trying to fit some of those into my bedtime reading habit, now that I have one.

When choosing new books to throw into the mix there are lots of criteria to consider. One criteria from my book group weighs heavy on my when I am considering a potential book: length. Even if the book isn't something I would recommend to the group, I need to make sure that I have time to read the book group's selection every month. So, I'm not willing to commit to a book that will take me more than a few weeks go get through, not even as a bedtime book. I'm too new to the ereader game to commit months to one book. I relish the idea of consuming multiple books in a month with my new toy.

When it comes to the printed word, I like my book group's guideline of under 400 pages. Audiobooks are a bit different. It depends on how much can I 'read' in 2-3 weeks? Considering the length of my commute, I look for books that are under twenty hours in length. That usually allows me to listen to two books a month, one for the group and one for just me.

I get all of my audiobooks from Audible.com. I used to buy them on CD, but it's so much easier listening to books on the iPod and not having to worry about remembering my place on a CD if I need to take the CD out of the car's player for some reason. So, I guess that's another limiting factor, since not all audiobooks are available there. Some are just on CD. Some are still just on tape!

When I dropped by Audible.com today one of the featured selections was Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin. I had heard that HBO had done a miniseries of the book, so I was curious. Since I don't get HBO maybe I would listen to the book instead. Wrong! The book is 34 hours long. Beyond my limit. This reminded me of a couple of other books that I had nixed for audio length reasons. Stephen King's Under the Dome is also just over 34 hours. Diana Gabaldon's The Outlander is around 32 hours.

When I am old, not only shall I wear purple, I shall read or listen to really long books!

Not done by a long shot

2011-02-19T14:05:00.002-05:00

I find myself engaging in lengthy conversations over email. One sided lengthy conversations. My partners in these conversations sometimes just don't get what I'm trying to say. Apparently, I've forgotten what blogging is all about.

There are lots of times when what I want to say is longer than a standard Twitter or Facebook post. And, what I want to say is not directed at one person. Isn't that kind of communication what blogs were all about. Let's see if I can't remember to let lose here on topics that are worth more than a paragraph, that don't have any bearing on any one particular individual.

Here's a glimpse into some of the topics that have been swimming around in the flotsam:

- my Kindle
- redecorating as emotional catharsis
- why I need to be single
- will I have an empty nest & the corresponding syndrome
- television addiction versus reading desires
- I love my new bed
- Is a FWB relationship really what I need right now? (I think so.)
- Do I know how to have a plan-free weekend?

Thinking of an Island

2011-01-16T09:34:00.002-05:00

I'm sure many of my friends would love to get away to an Island, somewhere warm, about now. I too am dreaming of an Island vacation. However my Island is not warm right now. I can hardly wait for Star Island to release the Summer schedule and registration information.

Good advice, not resolutions

2011-01-14T15:07:00.003-05:00

The following is from the September 2010 issue of Whole Living magazine:

You body already knows how to heal itself; you just have to get out of its way
Go ahead, vent a little. Think of it as detox for the soul.
Good posture isn't about rigidity, but fluidity.
When you can appreciate being alone, you're rarely lonely.
Clutter is the byproduct of indecision. Make sure everything in your space is there because you choose to keep it.
You may not be in school any more, but there's always more to learn.
True sufficiency doesn't mean having plenty; it means having enough.
Pay attention to how you walk. Ask yourself what you're rushing toward or away from.
Transform anxiety into excitement; focus not on the fear of what lies ahead but the possibilities you might create.
Lead with your heart, not your ego.

I'm going to post this as a note on FB too, since more of my friends hang out there then here. :)

The last day

2010-11-30T21:01:00.002-05:00

I have appreciated the opportunity this past month to reflect on the things that I am grateful for. Today, I must admit that November is nearly done.

I have learned quite a bit about myself this month. There is a lot to be grateful for. I plan on coming back to this month's postings when life starts to drag me down. I may need these reminders from time to time that life doesn't totally suck.

Every day is full of little joys and little annoyances. Some days bring big joys or big annoyances. If it was all of one, you wouldn't appreciate or recognize the other.

I contributed to an insightful bit of banter today that has little to do with 'gratitude' other than I was grateful to have participated:

"Common sense is over rated and over stated."

Count your blessings that you are beyond common!

A good morning

2010-11-29T20:50:00.002-05:00

It's Monday. My teen is not a morning person. He couldn't figure out how to use the new shower knob (probably because it actually worked correctly, unlike the one that it replaced).

However, he did everything he was supposed to do this morning AND put up the new holiday tree too.

It's the little things that make a day bearable.

Tools and skills

2010-11-28T12:49:00.002-05:00

The faucet on our shower broke yesterday. It was nearly impossible to turn the water on, or to a proper temperature. Part of me wanted to panic. Plumbing?!?!?! Of course it would happen on a Saturday. Oh dear. What were we going to do without a shower/bath until sometime Monday or Tuesday. Panic. Panic.

Breathe.

I decided to see if I could figure out what was wrong. I got a screwdriver and removed the handle from the faucet. The circular portion inside that surrounded the mechanism to manage the water flow had broken, so that it couldn't grip the mechanism fully any longer. I wondered if I could get a replacement handle, or if I would have to get a whole new assembly. If I could get a new handle that would work, I could avoid a plumber encounter.

I went to Home Depot with the broken part in my pocket. I saw a few shower faucet assemblies before I found the aisle with the replacement bits. There were boatloads to choose from. Fortunately, the packaging is such that you can open it up and see if you're getting the right part before you buy it. I looked at a few before deciding on the one that seemed the most likely replacement part for my broken handle.

I didn't go straight home. I ran some other errands while I was out. Then, I forgot about it when I first got home. A few hours later I remembered. I was pretty nervous when I entered the bathroom with the part in my hand. If this didn't work, we were pretty screwed for a few days.

I was impressed when the part seemed to fit perfectly. I put the handle back together, and then I tested the assembly out. Victory! Not only did it work, it seemed to fit more snugly than the last handle had.

With my new found confidence, I decided to mount a hook in my closet today with my (relatively) new drill. I hadn't used it myself yet. I had gotten K to use it yesterday to install a hook and eye assembly for me. Using the drill myself turned out to be wicked easy too!

I can hardly wait to buy the Dremel tool I've been eying for the last few days. This whole "Tool Time" theme could get addictive!

Got stood up!

2010-11-27T21:04:00.003-05:00

Yes, and that is what I am grateful for.

I was going to meet a friend at a free concert in Nashua this evening. Nashua had closed the streets of downtown to vehicular traffic. They do this every year. It's called "The Holiday Stroll". Merchants stay open on Saturday night. There are concerts and street food. The streets are pretty crowded with pedestrians. I've never gone before. Since this is the year of exploration, I decided that I would give this event a try, especially since I live just a mile or two from downtown Nashua.

A new friend of mine suggested that we meet at one of the concert venues at 5:30. I have been fighting a headache all day. But, I decided to push through it to meet her. Parking was insane, but I figured it out. The venue was incredibly difficult to find (if you have seen "Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist", it was like trying to find Where's Fuzzy). I got there a few minutes late, but my friend wasn't there. I sat down and enjoyed the concert all the same. I kept looking over my shoulder to see if she had showed up. At 6:15 the concert ended. I looked around one more time and then started wandering downtown Nashua with the rest of the throng. It was fun.

Had my friend showed up, I would have not necessarily gone into all the places that I went into. Or, I may not have skipped some of the places that I had. However, the biggest point is, had we not had the date to meet up at 5:30 I may not have gone at all because of the headache.

So, all things happen the way they should.

The un-black Friday

2010-11-26T22:05:00.002-05:00

Since I didn't have a car at my disposal until early afternoon, and I really think that I have internalized that I am pretty broke, I resisted the urge to run out to a large shopping establishment and wait in line for hourse to save $20 on something.

I did end up buyng a 32" TV for the exercise room, and I bought some jeans and undies. All accomplished from the comfort of my desk chair.

The best part of today was going over to one of my gaming friend's house to play games for hours on end. I am so glad that I found a group of gamers that I get along with, who have relatively good guest manners, while be totally approachable. Thank goodness I haven't encounter anyone 'out there' thus far.

Now I just need to figure out how to do more of the activities that the user arrange.

Not from a big crazy family

2010-11-25T17:04:00.003-05:00

It's Thanksgiving, and I'm spending it completely by myself. Do not feel sorry for me in the least. K went to his girlfriend's house in Maine. While I do miss him, I could have gone with him. I just wasn't up for putting on my 'social' face for an entire day.

I think one of the most stressful Thanksgivings I ever spent was when I was in grad school and I went home with my (then) boyfriend. His mother was not a happy person and she didn't like the looks of me from the get go. I had to make conversation or feign interest in various things all day and night long.

I grew up an only child to a relatively asocial single parent. I think my mom's preference for 'alone time' rubbed off on me.

Don't get me wrong. I have a lot of good friends that I care loads about. I also have a half brother and a step brother who I adore. And I love seeing everyone under casual circumstances. But 'holidays' are not casual circumstances. When you don't see folks very often, you're supposed to be on your best behavior for a 'holiday'.

I am really enjoying lounging around my house watching movies, eating what I feel like eating, and drinking my bottle of wine (slowly over the course of the evening).

I hope that all of my loved ones are having fun and relaxing days. I look forward to seeing all of them on some 'non holiday' occasion.

Stop the "go"

2010-11-24T22:13:00.002-05:00

My son left for Maine around 3 this afternoon. He won't be back until around 3 on Friday afternoon. Since he took my car, I'm kind of stuck in my house since there's not much to do within walking distance. Plus, with tomorrow being a holiday, there's nothing even open if I could get anywhere.

This is not a bad thing. I'm just so used to having the freedom to "go". Not only that, I often feel compelled to "go" somewhere all the time, even when I have no real need to "go" anywhere in particular.

I have plenty to do here in my home. I have lots of projects that I could work on. I also have lots of movies I could watch, thereby being unproductive.

I actually like my house. I just need to get over this absurd need to "go". I am thankful for the opportunity to overcome that compulsion, if only for a couple of days.

Flowers in winter

2010-11-23T23:52:00.000-05:00

OK. I know it's not winter yet. However, it is no longer 'flower season'.

I stopped by the grocery store on the way home to pick up a few last minute things for my Thanksgiving. One of the things that I snagged was a bouquet of flowers for my table.

For years I didn't bring flowers into the house, and I discouraged my X from bringing me any. Any time we had flowers in the house, the cats would knock over the vase and attempt to eat the things.

Fortunately, the cats do not seem to be that interested in flowers any more.

I am grateful that I can have flowers, off season, on my table to cheer me.

Electronica

2010-11-22T22:11:00.002-05:00

Where would I be without the Internet?

I moved hundreds of miles away from my dearest friends. I have only a few friends where I ended up. Without the amazing Internet, I would be like a ship adrift at sea.

I am grateful to all of those people and organizations that have supported the Internet since the 70's. Without the Internet, I would feel pretty alone up here in the great white New England north. :)

Mixed day

2010-11-21T23:02:00.002-05:00

Took K to church with me and then on to the church's Thanksgiving potluck. K was a surly teen (I "forced him" to go). We eventually made a peace of sorts walking amongst the horses at the farm where the feast was held.

I am still grateful for the wonderful church community that I belong too.

A great day and a bit more distance from the past

2010-11-20T17:03:00.002-05:00

I had an absolutely fabulous day!

I did my normal Saturday morning laze about, followed by exercise and such (laundry, kitchen stuff). Then, I spent most of the day at my Church's holiday faire, including luxuriating with an hour massage.

Afterwards, I went shopping for a new holiday tree. We currently have a 6-7' monster of a tree that is hard for me to carry by myself. Since it's just K and I now, I am thinking that a 4-5' tree is more practical. I haven't decided on one, but I'm close.

On the way home, I swung by a jewelry store and did something I've been wanting to do for months. I had them cut my wedding and engagement rings off my left ring finger. I have put on a lot of weight since I got married. I had hoped to be well on the road to losing the weight by now so that I could take the rings off by myself. But that hasn't happened. I need to get rid of a bunch more karmic baggage before I can attack my weight issue. And, one thing that I knew would make me feel better was getting those rings off my hand.

Wow! I felt years younger and instantly happier when the jeweler pull the cut rings away from my finger. I sold the gold to him for next to nothing, and kept the stone from the engagement ring. It's small and pear shaped, so the market for it is kind of limited. Maybe I'll do something with it someday. For now, I'm just happy to have those reminders of my marriage off my hand. My hand feels strange right now, but in a good way.

I'm grateful for the wonderful day that I had, especially checking off a huge item on my "to do" list!

Tried not to be the Material Girl, but...

2010-11-19T21:42:00.002-05:00

When it comes to getting in touch with my 'gratitude', I was hoping to steer clear of anything materially oriented. You know: no 'stuff'. However, there are a few modern conveniences that I am overwhelmingly grateful for.

Let me first express my deep felt thanks to Apple for developing the iPod. I had two different MP3 players before I had an iPod. They were fine things, as were the various and sundry other portable entertainment devices (CD Player, tape player, radio, etc.) However, the integration of the iPod with all the content available via iTunes got me hooked.

I love podcasts. I love audiobooks (which I was addicted to before I had an iPod). I love the ease of making playlists and downloading and ripping music.

That is not to say that I haven't experienced a few frustrations here and there with both my iPod and iTunes.

Overall, I really cannot imagine my life without my iPod. If the end of civilization comes, I hope I have a solar charger for my iPod.

My health is not that bad

2010-11-18T20:27:00.002-05:00

I suffer from chronic pain issues. I have trouble sleeping. I'm wicked overweight. And, I suffer from terrible hot flashes due to menopause. Still, I am grateful for my health.

Today, as I walked through the cafeteria I noticed a young man who I have encountered in the elevators a number of times. He gets around in a pretty serious looking wheelchair. Someone was sitting next to him. My curiosity got me to look in that direction for a few more seconds. The woman sitting next to him had a spoonful of food hovering mid-air.

I admire how forward this young man lives his life. He needs assistance with eating and has no problem doing so in a large busy cafeteria. I cannot imagine how many difficulties he has to live with.

I am grateful for the health that I have.

Parental patience

2010-11-17T21:44:00.003-05:00

For the last week, K has been whining that his hair needs cut. Normally it's me whining at him to get it cut. It really wasn't bothering me.

Tonight, when I got home, I offered to take him to get it cut. He barely hesitated before going to get his shoes on. When I asked him a few minutes later how much he planned to get cut off, he said about an inch, which was exactly what I would have gone for.

So, I am grateful that I am now able to not be bothered by the length of his hair AND that he and I agree as to what length is manageable. Only another 6742 issues left to resolve! :D

Audiobooks

2010-11-16T18:43:00.002-05:00

It typically takes me an hour to get to work each day, and then an hour to get home. I don't let this bother me. I've accepted it as part of my existence. However, I hate to give over ten hours of my week to simple 'driving'. So, over the years I have become an audiobook addict. A good book makes the time go by wonderfully. When I'm listening to a great book, I actually hate for the ride to be over!

Currently I am listening to Anthony Bourdain's "Medium Raw".

I am grateful for audiobooks!

Sleepiness

2010-11-15T18:44:00.000-05:00

Didn't sleep hardly at all last night. Just started to nod off in front of the television. I love it when that happens, since it usually guarantees a good night of sleep.

Grateful for sleepiness

Colors

2010-11-14T21:57:00.002-05:00

I'm working on a little painting project. I'm converting my X's old office into a television and exercise room. I decided to paint two of the walls with sunset colors. The first coat of paint was a very bright yellow. This afternoon I added some bright orange sponging and spatters. Lastly, I'll be adding some red sponging.

Not only do I really like the colors, but there's a bit of a 'revenge factor' going. Yes, it's small of me. But, let me harvest what little pleasures I can. The X did not appreciate color on walls until just a few years ago, and that was after much prodding on my part. He definitely would not have agreed to bright colors, especially multiple abstract bright colors. So, doing this little experiment in his former office is kind of a blast for me.

If I decide that I don't like it, I can always repaint it at some point. I love color and I love experimenting with it.

Fair well boring white and earth tones. Let the colors shine through!

Serendipity

2010-11-13T22:59:00.002-05:00

This afternoon I was planning on going to a movie. Before I left, I decided to check on the sermon topic of the local church. (I belong to a church far away of the same denomination.) I noted that they had something going on at the church this very evening. My goodness, a concert by a folk singer that I actually know. Only $20. Sold.

I went to the concert and ran into 10 people from MY CHURCH! Two of them had actually switched and started going to the church closer to me. Guess I'll see them tomorrow.

I'm really glad that I decided to go to the concert (after the movie). It's rare that I give into spur of the moment ideas. It turned out great!

College interview

2010-11-12T23:17:00.002-05:00

K and I went out to Worcester today so that he could interview at WPI (his #1 college choice). We were a bit worried about his erratic grades over the last year. He is co-captain of his FIRST robotics team and he's done moderately well on his SATs.

The interviewer was pretty impressed with him. She said that having the interview helps, but that he has a lot going for him. Plus, having him explain that his grade fluctuations are partially due to our stressful home life this last year also will give the admissions folks a clearer picture of K.

K walked away feeling like it was time well spent and that he has a good shot at getting in. Yippee! (Now, ... about that $52k/yr cost of going there ...)

Veterans

2010-11-11T23:30:00.000-05:00

I personally know several serving military. I also know a couple of former military. I am constantly impressed with their service oriented attitude. They all carry their own opinions about how our government is run, but none of them question the value of their service to their fellow citizens.

I am grateful that there are folks willing to serve our country.

Naps

2010-11-10T22:00:00.002-05:00

I took a 2 hour nap this afternoon. I feared that it might be too much of a good thing when I wanted to go to sleep tonight. However, I am thoroughly exhausted so I shouldn't have too much trouble falling over in a bit. Had I given into the urge to sleep even longer this afternoon, I may have been in trouble now.

I don't feel the need for a nap every day. However, I feel the pull more often than I can actually give into it. So, I am truly grateful when I can give in.

Hooray for naps!

Alone time

2010-11-09T18:11:00.002-05:00

Actually, I'm NOT feeling very grateful this evening. My son and I had a HUGE blow up this evening. I actually do not regret a single thing word that came out of my mouth. He lied to me repeatedly. Though it was over something minor, I gave him ample opportunity to correct his mistake and he knows how much I hate being lied to. Then, when I called him on it he merely glared at me and asked "Why are we still talking about this?" That, on top of a little stunt he pulled last night (and gave me attitude about it this morning) really set me off.

I really do bend over backwards to accommodate my son. Whenever he asks for something I usually agree. I also try to anticipate when he might need something or some-doing, and I try to take care of it before he asks. So, the attitude made me feel very disrespected.

My response was to take back my agreement that his girlfriend could come down from Maine Wednesday night and stay until Thursday evening. I really do like L. She's a good influence on K. However, I have to draw the line somewhere.

He was angry with my pronouncement. He accused me of hurting somebody else because I was angry at him. I don't see it that way. Having his girlfriend spend the night when he's being disrespectful to me means that he gets to have a privilege while he's treating me horribly. WRONG!

He came to me a while later and asked if he could spend the night at a friend's house tonight because he "needs some space." I thought about it for a minute and then agreed. I need some space too.

So, I'm grateful for some alone time!

In honor of my mother

2010-11-08T20:53:00.002-05:00

My mother passed away in 1997. She and I had a rocky relationship, to say the least. I think we would get along better now if she were still alive. Now that I have a teenager to deal with and a failed marriage, I think I understand a lot of what formed who she was.

I wish I could talk to her about all that has happened in the last couple of years. I'm sure she'd have something insightful to say. She was really good at giving advice, in my opinion.

I'm grateful that I had my mom for as long as I did. She showed me how to be unapologetically myself. She showed me how to be strong and independent and to actually relish the idea of living alone (or at least not with a sexual partner, since we both had/have teenagers to deal with).

I don't know how I would have handled this last couple of years had I not been raised by the mother I was raised by. Thank you, Mom, for giving me the proper tools to master an intolerable season as best as I could.

A very pleasantly long Sunday

2010-11-07T20:45:00.002-05:00

I purposefully stayed up past midnight last night in an attempt to help adjust to the extra hour we got last night when the clocks changed. I still got up around 07:30 (adjusted new time). The day drifted along slowly. I didn't get as much done as I would have liked. However, I did get some laundry in and the grocery shopping. K came along so I picked up some of the heavier items that I hate to get when I'm on my own.

After we got everything home, I tried to take a nap. I really was quite tired, but mostly I just laid there with my eyes closed for an hour.

I spent about an hour trying to catch up on some stuff for work. Again, I didn't get as much done as I'd wanted to.

Then I made dinner and watched a movie. I got K to give the kitchen trash can a shower (this was a huge accomplishment).

It's nearly 9pm, but it feels to early to go to bed. Though, by yesterday's yard stick it's actually nearly 10pm.

Normally, I end up hating Sundays. But, with the confusion of the extra hour, I really did like this one. I think I need to figure out how to like Sundays more in general. After all, it is still a weekend day, right?

Happy Sunday. Thanks for the extra hour!

Music

2010-11-06T18:11:00.002-04:00

While I know that it would be harder to function in this world without my sight than without my hearing, I sometimes think that if I had to lose one of the two senses I'd choose to go without my sight.

I love music. I cannot imagine a life without music. Music can boost my mood (as in improve it). Or music can enhance and deepen a mood that I'm already in (even if I'm a little angry or a little depressed, the right music can carry me into 'very' angry or 'very' depressed).

Music helps engage my mind or distract me from situations that I would rather not contemplate (traffic, standing in a queue, exercising).

I enjoy all kinds of musical genres depending on my mood.

So, color me grateful for music!

It's not just a job

2010-11-05T19:27:00.002-04:00

I have been pretty lucky in my career choices. For the last four years I have been doing something that is never boring with people who I enjoy for pretty fabulous money in a relatively laid back environment. It's not a perfect situation. After all it is still "work". However, this is probably the best job I've ever had. Also, for the last two and a half years I have worked for the best boss that I've ever had. The only downside is the 31 mile commute. Fortunately, I can work from home on occasion!

So, I am grateful that I have a fulfilling career in a situation that is pretty darn good.

New friends

2010-11-04T20:56:00.002-04:00

I have made some new friends this last year, in spite of my over-sharing about the ins and outs of my divorce. These intrepid souls listened even when they barely knew me and didn't run screaming in the other direction. Now that I'm just about through to the other side of this dark period of my life, they are still there.

So thank you to my various and sundry meetup.com buddies. Now we can just be silly without the threat of invasion by random melodrama.

A quiet day

2010-11-03T19:22:00.002-04:00

Today I am grateful for the quiet and darkness in our office. Over half of our team were out for various reasons. Those of us who were left to hold down the fort prefer the lights out. So, we worked under pleasantly dim conditions today. We also took the opportunity to listen to music together, instead of all diving into our own little headphoned worlds. We decided to listen to the complete catalog of Trans Siberian Orchestra. It was wonderful.

I had no meetings. Several things I was working on went right for a change. My gym time was a pleasant break.

Ah ... the quiet. It is a rare and wonderful thing.

Old friends

2010-11-02T19:09:00.002-04:00

I am grateful that my old college friends are still in my life, albeit remotely. Facebook reinvigorated our relationship. And, none too soon, I might add.

I do not know how I would have handled the disintegration of my marriage without the patient ears and words of comfort from my long time college friends. Facebook even inspired me to get on a plane and spend some quality face-to-face time with my support system.

Thanks folks for being there!

A month of gratitude

2010-11-01T23:59:00.002-04:00

In honor of National Blog Posting Month, I've decided to blog each day about something that I'm grateful for. The postings may not be long, but I am committed to doing them to remind myself that there is a lot to be grateful for in my life.

Today, I am grateful for so many things. Let me start with my son. K is a bright seventeen year old. He has been a real trooper this last year as we've weathered a very stressful home situation. He and I have become closer because of the divorce. While we don't see eye to eye on everything, I think we have a pretty good relationship.

I am blessed to have a son like K.

Reason #3 why I love my new room

2010-07-15T20:48:00.002-04:00

I have an excellent computer setup. My iMac has a 1Tb drive, plus I have several external drives connected to it. Over the last year or so I have collected about a hundred movies and another hundred television episodes. In addition, I have been copying some of my favorite movies do my computer. The whole point here is so I can watch fun stuff without leaving my room.

My housemate is slowly getting the message that I have no desire to spend ANY time with him. He wanted to watch a movie tonight and asked me if the movie appealed to me. I encouraged him to go ahead and watch it if he wanted to. I then returned to my attic room. Tonight's entertainment was the first two episodes of season two of "Warehouse 13". He likes the series too. Since we have canceled the SFYC the only way to watch the show is online. Maybe he'll look into viewing the episodes via hulu. Maybe not. Good luck!

Failing again

2010-07-14T21:20:00.002-04:00

OK. Apparently, I am incapable of posting to my blog every day. I was hoping that committing to doing so would help distract me from the turmoil of my home life. Turns out that almost nothing is distracting enough for that at this point.

What does distract me, at least briefly? Organizing my new room. I've moved into the attic bedroom that my son used to occupy. He moved into the newly finished basement.

I try to do a little something every evening after work. In addition to generally organizing the room, I'm creating and organizing a significant collection of media files so that I can be easily entertained up her in my dark tower. Between things I've grabbed via TiVo and DVD's that I've ripped to my iMac I have around a hundred movies and a hundred episodes of television programs that I like. On top of that I have access to streaming via Netflix and Hulu. I'm also amassing a bit of a video library via Amazon.

While this may seem like a small thing, I really like zoning out to video entertainment. And, right now, I could use all the relaxing I can grab.

Bad to good

2010-07-09T21:43:00.002-04:00

Today's prompt from NaBloPoMo: What's a bad thing that happened to you that ended up turning into something good?

I used to think that the end of one relationship, which led to the beginning of another, was a good thing. These days, I'm not so sure.

Overall, I try to look on the bright side of minor inconveniences these days. You might as well. Wallowing in the negative aspects of a situation doesn't do anyone any good. Sometimes it is unavoidable to get caught up in the negative aspects of a situation. Crap just happens. It's not the universe out to get you. Figure out if there was anything you could have done differently. Make a mental note to adjust your behavior in the future. And then, MOVE ON!

I'm living in the middle of a really bad situation right now. It would be so easy to just curl up in a ball and moan about how miserable the situation is. However, that won't change a darn thing. It's better to try to make the best out of the situation and to focus on the future. Some day, this too shall pass.

Would you change your appearance?

2010-07-08T20:28:00.002-04:00

Today's prompt from NaBloPoMo: "If you could change one thing about your appearance, what would it be? Or would you change anything at all?"

Sadly, I am one of the many that would gladly change things about my appearance if I could. I don't know how this fantasy request would theoretically work. I mean, could I say that I wish that I was magically 35% lighter than I am now? That would be my first request.

If we had to go with something that wasn't just a general weight loss, I would probably want my thighs liposuctioned. I mean, even if I lost all the weight on my own (I have dropped it before), I would be unhappy with the cellulite in my thighs.

On the other hand, I do have these bags on my eyelids. My mom had them too. Maybe I would be thrilled to get an eyelid tuck.

Nah, the thighs must go!

Skill envy

2010-07-07T19:53:00.002-04:00

Today's NaBloPoMo prompt: "What's one skill you wish you had? What's keeping you from learning it?"

I wish I was fluent in at least one foreign language. While it sounds lame, I think the biggest impediment has been time. Learning a foreign language is not easy. It takes dedication and practice. Then you have to use the skill periodically or it fades somewhat.

I also wouldn't mind knowing basic auto mechanics. It would be really satisfying to understand how my car works and to be able to figure out what's wrong with it when it ails. Again, I'm going to pull out the "time" reason.

There are lots of things that I'd love to learn to do or just to have knowledge of. The need to earn a living does get in the way. So, as soon as I hit that lottery jack pot I'm going on a learning bender!

A famous movie you've never seen

2010-07-06T20:06:00.003-04:00

Today's NaBloPoMo prompt is: Name one famous movie you've never seen. Why not?

There are actually a couple that I am embarrassed that I've not made the time to see:

Citizen Kane

Easy Rider

The Wild Bunch

Midnight Cowboy

Rebel Without a Cause

Giant

The Women

China Town

The reason is the same for all of them: Because I simply have not gotten around to it. I actually love movies. I love watching them. I love discussing them. Sometimes I love watching them multiple times. There just aren't enough hours in the day really.

Maybe now that I've listed those films, I'll remember them when I'm looking for something to rent and watch.

What is the one thing you spend money on?

2010-07-05T23:04:00.002-04:00

From today's NaBloPoMo prompt: "What's one thing you think it's worth spending money on? What's one thing you always cheap out on?"

While it may sound trivial, the one thing that we don't compromise in our house on is toilet paper. We insist on really soft stuff here.

In a similar vein, I will definitely 'cheap out' on other paper products like napkins, paper towels, ziploc baggies, aluminum foil, and the like. Most times it just doesn't matter what 'quality' those products are.

However, we must be good to our bottoms in our house!

What's your favorite color?

2010-07-04T17:45:00.001-04:00

Last year, a good friend sold me a beautiful quilt she had made for less than half the price she had offered it on her store: Shadow Manor. The wonderful quilt inspired me to decorate my new attic refuge around it. The quilt is black, gray, lavender, and white. The primary colors of my room are lavender and gray walls, with (primarily) black wooden furniture. I tossed in a little orange here and there for a little extra Halloween theme.

When I was a kid, I thought my favorite color was red. In high school I had a yellow room, but then switched to pink and purple. If asked from that point onward, I would say that my favorite color was blue. Now, I'm torn.

I love purples and pinks. However, I love black and orange as well. And, most of my dress up clothes end up being brown, for some reason. I'm also planning on decorating another room in red and orange to mimic the colors of sunset.

So, if you ask me what my favorite color is, the answer you get will probably depend on the time of the day, day of the week, and in what context I'm considering the choice to apply to.

I can say this, however. My days of preferring muted colors for clothing and interior design are pretty much done. I'm almost fifty years old, and I like color, color that has something to say. Color shouldn't be a background or an afterthought. Use color with a purpose. You can wear earth tones that speak (they don't have to be demur and boring). You can design a room in pastels, but still have a message for the eye.

Don't be afraid of color. Don't be driven by what other people might think or like. Use color to please yourself, from the color of your hair, to the color of your socks, to the color of your car (I truly covet a obnoxiously lime green car I see in the work parking lot sometimes.) Life is too short not to enjoy yourself in a relatively harmless but creatively fun way.

Live the rainbow!

Sparkling vampires aside

2010-07-03T21:40:00.002-04:00

Does that make up for missing yesterday?

Went to see "Twilight: Eclipse" tonight. No surprises for me since I have read the books. However, I have to say that it'd be pretty easy to be on Team Jacob. My favorite Taylor Lautner line happens 85% of the way through the movie. Bella, Jacob, and Edward are camped out on top of a mountain trying to hide Bella from a vampire army. Bella is about to freeze to death when Edward decides to let Jacob climb in the sleeping bag with Bella to keep her from dying. After Jake climbs in with her, he lays there with his very sculpted chest partially exposed and grinning. He looks at Edward and says something like, "What can I say? I'm hot." Nice double entendre there. While the shape shifters do run pretty hot, Taylor Lautner is VERY HOT looking.

The Twilight series is so totally geared towards young women. The vampires annoy traditional vampire fans because they break a lot of the standards. However, I enjoy the series despite the "vampire" aspect of it. It's a bit shallow and hormonal, but still fun.

Definitely looking forward to Bella's transformation in Breaking Dawn.

Feeling virtuous, but not green

2010-07-03T06:19:00.001-04:00

I am in the process of tossing a lot of stuff from my house. Some of the stuff is still quite usable (bookcases, lumber). The 'green' thing to do would be to put ads on Freecycle or Craigslist. Instead, I am having a junk removal service come and take it to the dump.

I do feel guilty about this. However, I did already Freecycle a lot of stuff in the last six months. I just can't mentally manage the process any longer right now. I need to declutter my house, particularly the attic room I'm moving into.

I hope Mother Earth can forgive me. I plan on lessening my impact on the Earth significantly in this next year or so. I am on a very tight budget, so I won't be buying frivolous things or wasting the utilities absently. I know that I'll be the happier for both as well.

There is much I can do to amuse myself that costs very little once my new room situation is completely settled.

Trying again for July

2010-07-01T19:42:00.003-04:00

I'm going to try again for posting every day this month per NaBloPoMo. Today's prompt: "What is your favorite movie?"

Just one? That is so UNFAIR. There are about a dozen movies that I will watch virtually any time that they are on, particularly late at night when I'm flipping channels because I can't sleep. Most of those are in my profile. I think I can narrow it down to the ones that I know the most lines from:

Clerks
Aliens
Office Space
Willow
Princess Pride
Snatch
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Better Off Dead

What I did on my summer vacation

2010-06-19T22:21:00.002-04:00

Arts Week on Star Island was a wonderful experience. While I didn't relax as much as I should have, I certainly relaxed a lot for me. However, me being me and all, I couldn't relax without actually accomplishing something. Here are things that I accomplished (or am otherwise grateful for):

Got up every morning, learned a new silly song, and tromped around the Island waking people up as part of the Wake Up Singers.
Finally learned how to take pictures beyond complete automatic with my digital SLR camera, thanks to the photography workshop run by Parrish Dobson.
Chatted with a lot of interesting people.
Actually studied a sunset from a wonderful vantage point.
Learned that photographs aren't always about capturing what's in front of you. Sometimes you can use the instrument to see what's in front of you in a new and intriguing way.
Visited Appledore Island.
Saw a seal bobbing in the waves.
Saw lots of baby seagulls.
Saw a basking shark on the way back from Star to Portsmouth. It was flipping HUGE.
Went on 2 guided nature walks.
Attended a production of the 15 minute "Hamlet" (way way too funny)
Read some of Dorothy Rowe's "Guide to Life"
Had a lime rickey every day!

Goals for next time:

Get to ring the lunch bell.
Jump in the freezing ocean with the Polar Bears.
Try something new (maybe Dance or Theater)
Prepare for morning singers with some great words of the day and some prizes for people who join us all 6 mornings.

Unplugging

2010-06-12T07:39:00.003-04:00

NaBloPoMo doesn't give prompts on weekends.

I am probably not going to succeed in posting every day this month since I'm about to toddle off to Star Island for a week. I probably will not have Internet connectivity out there, which is one of the things that I really loved about the place last year.

Unplugging is a wonderful thing. Everyone who spends a significant portion of their lives staring at a screen of some sort should take a week off from it and go through the clutter in their own heads.

I will still be staring at a screen a bit. I'm going to Star to attend a writing workshop. I'm taking my netbook primarily to have a writing tool. Hopefully, my muse will gladly accompany me since she'll have a lot of my undistracted attention (not having to compete with Internet and television).

Wish the two of us luck on our little adventure together.

Kiss, kiss, kiss

2010-06-11T23:35:00.000-04:00

Tell us about your first kiss

I was six years old. Greg Meadows was a neighbor. I thought that he was so cute with his dark Indian skin, brown eyes, and jet black hair. We were standing behind a huge cherry tree in my backyard where no one could see us. The kiss was short, sweet, and gentle.

Greg was officially my 'boyfriend' for a couple of weeks. I don't remember anything else about our time together but that kiss.

Thanks, Greg!

A message to my 16 year old self

2010-06-10T22:44:00.002-04:00

From NaBloPoMo:

If you could go back in time and meet your 16-year-old self, what three things would you tell yourself?

Study harder and go for the best school you can get into

Wait for sex. But go for the one who really seems to care about you, but use a condom. Try not to break his heart, but feel free to say yes to anyone you think would be fun. Don't get attached, but always be safe.

Give your mom a break, she just wants the best for you

Contradictory? I don't think so. Basically, get the most out of life that you can and cut your mom a break.

A thousand paper cranes

2010-06-09T19:51:00.002-04:00

From NaBloPoMo:

Japanese lore suggests that if you fold 1,000 paper cranes, your wish will come true. What would your wish be, and what would you be willing to do 1,000 times to get it?

My wish: To get out of my current predicament in better financial, emotional, and physical shape than I have ever been in my entire life, in less than six months.

What would I be willing to do 1,000 times? Anything I'd be willing to do once that didn't cause me or anyone else any real physical harm and that is not illegal. Cranes? Bring it on!

If I had a million dollars

2010-06-08T13:13:00.002-04:00

NaBloPoMo graciously selected a prompt that I suggested for today:

You've just been given a million dollars. You are not allowed to keep it or give it to anyone you know personally. What do you do with it and why?

I figured this would be a good way to explore one's charitable impulses.

I think that I would figure out how to spread the money around. While giving that kind of cash to a small charity might have a big impact, I think it would be cool to improve a lot of lives a bit.

I would definitely put some money in Kiva, an organization which helps entrepreneurs around the globe by connecting them with microlenders. Sometimes it takes just a little money to really change someone's circumstances.

I would probably research small charities in my own community to see where I could help the most. One local place I would definitely help out would be the Nashua Soup Kitchen, as well as Nashua's chapter of Habitat for Humanity, and the Nashua Humane Society. Another local charity that I would want to help would be the Neighbor Helping Neighbor Fund; they help people pay their utility bills (people who are generally not qualified for government fuel assistance for some reason).

I might also send some money to the Central Asia Institute. They build schools and help communities in central Asia. You can read about the beginnings of this organization in Greg Mortenson's Three Cups of Tea.

One somewhat frivolous charity that I would definitely give a huge chunk of change to would be The Enchanted Forest Preservation Society. The Enchanted Forest was a fairytale inspired theme park that I visited a few times as a child. I loved that place. I was so sad to hear that it had closed. The Preservation Society is trying to save a lot of the fairytale buildings and artifacts.

I think it would also be cool and maybe fun to help out random strangers, anonymously. Think about it. I have a really good relationship with my auto mechanic. What if I asked him to be on the look out for someone who was really struggling financially who's car was having a lot of problems. Maybe I could convince him to charge the person a lot less, and let me pay the difference. Or maybe I could figure out a way to buy the person a reliable used car. The anonymous part might be harder there.

How about hanging out at the unemployment office and surreptitiously sliding $200 grocery store gift cards under windshield wipers of people who went in? That would really be fun.

... It was really nice to think of ways that I could help other people if I had the funds to spare. I do donate to others whenever I can. However, this last year and a half have been tight at my house. Things are about to get a lot tighter. So, I'll just have to dream about what it would be like to help others financially for now.

Do you owe an apology to anyone?

2010-06-07T19:53:00.002-04:00

NaBloPoMo asks if I owe an apology to anyone, and why.

Ha!

There is quite a list of people that I feel like I owe an apology to. But, let's go for the big one.

I'm sorry Mom. You and I never really got along when you were alive. I always admired you for your independence and how well you did in life in spite of not having graduated high school and ending up divorced as a single parent in your 30's. You were one tough woman with a lot of common sense.

I'm sorry that I didn't try harder to get along. I'm sorry for not appreciating you when you were alive. And now I'm sorry that you are not here to lend some emotional support while I go through this particularly trying time in my life. I really could use your insight and your voice of experience.

Prompt? We don't need no stinking prompt!

2010-06-06T21:14:00.002-04:00

In lieu of an actual prompt from NaBloPoMo, I decided to post on something near and dear to my heart: Apple rumors

On Monday, Steve Jobs will give the keynote speech at the Worldwide Developers Conference. He'll supposedly give light to what to expect from Apple for the rest of this year.

Most of the rumor mill are abound with tweaks to the wildly popular iPhone platform. Yes, yes. iPhone is fantastic. I get it.

I don't have one. I dont' want one. For me, a phone should be a phone. At least at this point in my existence.

On the other hand, I love my iPod. I have a 16Gb Nano (pre-camera). The only thing that could make me give up my current Nano would be if Apple would realize that some of us audio junkies really do want more portable storage.

Not one of the rumors surrounding tomorrow's keynote speech has anything to do with the Nano platform. For crying out loud, Apple! Wake up and smell the music junkies. I did not need a camera on my Nano. That was a retarded enhancement. I need a Nano with 32Gb or, better still, 64Gb of reliable solid state storage.

Currently, I cart around a tenth of my music collection, about a dozen podcasts, and one audio book. I need more damnit! My music tastes are extremely eclectic. I need more variety in my pocket. I also need more choice in my podcasts and audio books.

When, oh when, will Apple wake-up and realize that it still has a huge audience that are not all that interested in combining their portable media needs with Internet connectivity (the Touch) or with Internet and phone capabilities (the iPhone) or with Internet connectivity and an e-reader cum watered-down laptop (the iPad).

I don't want my MTV. I want my souped up Nano!

On my own then

2010-06-05T23:55:00.000-04:00

I waited until late at night to get a prompt from NaBloPoMo, but one never materialized.

I'm still getting over a nasty respiratory infection. But, that did not stop me from running errands like mad, enjoying an impromptu couple of hours at the pottery studio, not enjoying some drama at my house, seeing my son walk out the door with my car keys for 24 hours, and then spending some more quality time working on finishing our basement.

I finally got around to watching the first episode of the latest season of Dr Who. Not bad. The irony is that I just down graded our cable subscription so that we won't have BBCA any longer. Fortunately, Dr Who is one of the few shows I can pick up through Amazon's download service. I do not mind paying for the stuff I watch. There was just so much that we were paying for and not consciously watching. We were certainly watching a lot of dreck unconsciously.

Hopefully, the prompts will be back for Sunday!

Thinking of my father

2010-06-04T21:22:00.002-04:00

Today's NaBloPoMo prompt is "What's the first thing that pops into your mind when you think of your father?"

Disappointment.

It's a long story that I'm not really up for getting into right now. I didn't grow up in the same household as my father. He wasn't around much. We never developed a close relationship. We still don't really understand each other.

On the other hand, he raised my half brother, who is one of my favorite people on the planet. So, I guess my Dad can't be all bad ... or at least he had astute taste in mothers for his progeny.

What is freedom?

2010-06-03T21:54:00.002-04:00

Today's NaBloPoMo prompt is "What is freedom?"

I appreciate the society I live in and the civic freedoms that it affords. I cannot imagine living without the freedom to say what is on my mind (for fear of losing my liberty or life) or to make any of the myriad of choices I am afforded by being part of such a society.

That said, there are choices that we make as individuals that impact certain granularities of our freedom. We all make compromises, sometimes without realizing what the ultimate impact will be.

In a year or so, I hope to be able to reclaim a bit of freedom and peace that I have long been without. It will probably cost me dearly on my levels (in addition to costs I have already paid), but it will be worth it.

The attainment of freedom is worth a high price tag, whether it is a civic freedom or a very personal one.

My favorite poem

2010-06-02T19:22:00.002-04:00

Today's prompt from NaBloPoMo is: What is your favorite poem?

That is a very difficult question to answer. I have several poems that I hold dear. Two are by Edgar Allan Poe:

The Bells
And
The Raven

Also, Rainer Maria Rilke's Corpse Washing

But I stumbled on one a few years ago I stumbled on a poem by C. David Hay, called "The Cemetery" It's not available online. Since I don't want to violate copyright, I'll just give you a few lines of this sixteen line poem:

Cold are the whispering winds that blow
Past chiseled marble--row on row.
Silent specters aglow in the night
Like sentries frozen in after light
Guarding the bones of those beneath--
Dust and ash be their bequeath.

Yes, I admit it. I do like a bit of the macabre in my poetry.

What did I want to be when I grew up?

2010-06-01T20:50:00.002-04:00

That's the prompt for today's NaBloPoMo.

At first I couldn't remember. But then I recalled all those floor plans I drew on graph paper. From about fifth grade through high school. I think I wanted to be an architect or an interior designer. Somehow in high school I forgot all about that. I got interested in science and technology and decided that I wanted to be an engineer. All the while, I was reading history books for fun.

So, what did I graduate with a degree in? History! Highly employable. That's why I went to graduate school. I majored in Information Studies (which was a cross between Librarianship and Computers). I worked in libraries for a while doing computers. I soon figured out that doing computers paid more than being a librarian. Sometimes, I miss the librarian stuff. Much less stress.

Give me another chance?

2010-05-31T16:48:00.003-04:00

I haven't posted to my blog since May 1st! There's a lot I could say in my defense. Work and personal life have been extremely stressful. And, considering the nature of my work and the nature of the personal life stress, I couldn't just openly blog about those situations.

However, NaBloPoMo has inspired me. I get an email from them at the end of each month, challenging me to get back into blogging in the upcoming month. They even give you daily prompts to help get you going.

In June, I'm spending a week on Star Island again. This time I'm going to Star Arts Week, and I plan on participating in the writing workshop. I'm also going to take my camera, but I decided that I'd benefit more by focusing on my writing.

So, I'm really going to try to write in my blog in June. Probably not every day like NaBloPoMo wants me to, but definitely a few times every week. Crossing my fingers that I can do this.

Apple shutting down Lala

2010-05-01T05:32:00.002-04:00

I really like Lala. Not only has it allowed me to post links to songs on my blog, but it's been the best service to listen to particular songs online for free.

If Apple is looking at a way to replace Lala's functionality on the Internet, I wish they would have figured that out before announcing that it will be shutting down Lala as of May 31st

To bid Lala a proper goodbye, maybe I'll post a song of the day until they close. It looks like Apple has done away with the embed feature (more bummer). But here's...

Lady Gaga's Poker Face

Refreshing the mind

2010-03-25T20:36:00.002-04:00

While it's been quite exhausting, I have been really enjoying myself this week trudging into Boston and Cambridge for some professional conferences this week. On Tuesday and Wednesday I attended Secure World. Today and tomorrow I'm at a conference on spam on MIT's Cambridge campus.

Not much at either conference has been earth shattering. I've picked up a few tidbits hear and there. Some of the presentations sparked some ideas on how I could do things different back at the office. And today, I got to walk in the sunshine during a lunch break.

I've been heavily involved in email conversations on my Blackberry the entire time that I've been out of the office. And, I've felt bad about missing some major events that went on acceptably without me.

On the whole though, I think it's been really good for me to get out of the office to explore how others are doing my job at other organizations. I have also learned that we're doing more of the right things than almost anyone else out there. Though, there's still a lot more I think we could be doing.

I highly recommend that all professionals get out of their offices and meet up with others in their field a few times a year. Both you and your organizations will be the better for it.

We all need friends

2010-02-28T16:10:00.002-05:00

Nearly ten years ago, our family moved from Maryland to New Hampshire. The greater Baltimore-Washington corridor was crowed and expense, particularly when it came to real estate. Crime was also a consideration. Then, there were the summers. While neither of us is a huge fan of cold snowy winters, my husband and I both despised hot humid summers. While the job market was pretty good (at the time), the most affordable places to live were at least a highly stressful hour's commute from most of the jobs.

So, off we moved to New Hampshire. Within a month we both had good jobs within 30 minutes of our rented townhouse. And the commutes were relatively low stress. In less than a year we'd found a great house with a huge yard that we could afford, without taking on significantly worse commutes. (We actually shifted. Goblin lessened his commute by 20 minutes, and I increased mine by 20 minutes. Though I was still within 30 minutes of work.)

A few years later we sold that house and moved to a somewhat smaller one for financial reasons. I then changed jobs and sucked up a longer commute. While more stressful, the current commute is still better than the average commute I had while living outside of Washington.

I regret very little about that migration. However, I do miss my friends from the mid Atlantic. We have made a few friends in New England, but we really don't socialize very often. Our friends from church are closer to the first house we had, twenty minutes to the north of our current house. Plus, Goblin's schedule has gotten pretty erratic with school and per diem work this year.

Since I'm really the gregarious one in our family, I decided to do something to improve my social life. I recently started browsing the various local Meetup groups in my area that might be of interest to me. I have already attended a meetup with some women who are interested in meditation and another with some folks interested in pottery. The later one inspired me to sign up for a one-day pottery class (that may lead to more classes). I'm considering attending a few other meetups as well.

I don't know if I'll make any 'good' friends as a result of my meetup activities, but it will be fun and help get me out of the house. I've been sitting around sulking about a few unfortunate events in our lives, of late. And, it's just not productive to dwell on things that you can't do anything about.

I may also just have to plan a trip down to Baltimore in the next few months. I really do miss a few people. We connect on Facebook, but it would be much better if I could spend the weekend with some of them, drinking, eating and laughing.

Finances are pretty tight, and I already have some other trips planned, so time is also a bit tight. But, maybe I can figure out a way. I do miss my friends.

Friends - Band of Skulls

My blog has been busy without me

2010-02-07T16:06:00.003-05:00

Over the last month I have received more comments on my blog than over any other THREE month period. That would be fabulous except that I've barely posted to my blog since the first of the year. Virtually every 'comment' has been that dreaded blog spam!

Sadly, to help cut down on the amount of such detritus I will no longer be accepting anonymous comments. So, those of you who do not have blogger accounts are welcome to read but you won't be able to comment. Feel free to email me or carry out your public poke of me over on Facebook. Both options mean that you have to know who I am.

A certain amount of anonymity is a wondrous thing for creativity and discourse. And, I really don't need to know exactly who you are for you to comment here. Only blogger has to know who you are, more or less. Similarly, blogger knows who I am in a more-or-less fashion.

This doesn't mean that I'll approve your comments. If your comment has nothing to do with the topic of my blog entry (and I don't personally know who you are), your comment will be rejected. If I do not know you personally, I will not accept a comment with any web links in it. Neither will I check out any such links myself even if your comment promises that I will:

Lose 30 pounds in 30 days

Earn $10,000/week (or more) doing ...

Endlessly please my woman in bed (I cannot perfect an anatomical part that I do not have)

Learn the secrets of the universe by listening to some profound new audio course

Live a longer and healthier life by taking a supplement derived from Yak manure

Be able to purchase foreclosed property for pennies on the dollar

I must however thank all you reprehensible spammers for getting me off my butt to post this entry. So, THANK YOU!

Maybe today will be a good day?

2010-01-11T06:43:00.003-05:00

Normally, I would go to playlist.com and give you all a repeat of the soundtrack that put me in this frame of mind, but I'm kind of rushed this morning. (Not too rushed NOT to say something about this, mind you.)

I think the music gods were smiling upon my tired achy body this morning when I started my exerbike ride. The first few tunes just happened magically without me skipping through the random offerings. By the end I had to skip more frequently to find the perfect grove. However, this combination was mostly perfect and uplifting, especially for a dreaded Monday morning:

I Bet You Look Good on the Dance Floor - Arctic Monkeys
Nugget - Cake
Lies - Thompson Twins
Car Wash - Rose Royce
Slice* - Five for Fighting
Goody Two Shoes - Adam Ant
It's Not OK - My Chemical Romance
Paper and Fire - John Mellencamp
Love Shack** - B52s
Red Skies at Night - Fixx

Happy Monday!

*"Have you read my blog today?"
**"I got my car and it's as big as a whale."

Lemonade out of lemons

2010-01-10T11:19:00.002-05:00

I'm trying not to let little annoyances totally piss me off any more. It's difficult for me. I have a tendency towards negativity and I am also easily riled up. However, I've decided that I really don't want to be that person any more.

Friday morning, my husband informed me that our all-in-one printer was jammed. I was on the exercise bike. I really hate being interrupted while I'm exercising. But, I calmly asked if he needed me to fix it at that very moment. He said 'no', so I asked him to please leave me a note so I would remember to look at it after I was done on the bike. Score "1" for me for not snapping at him like I normally would have for the interruption. (Yes, I really am normally THAT grouchy.)

After I finished my exercise session, I went to take a look at the printer. I had assumed that it was a simple thing. It was not. I could feel the irritation rise in me when I came to that realization. In order to clear the jam, I had to open the rear of the printer which still had the original packing tape on it for over a year ago. But, I took a deep breath and decided to look at the event as a challenge to solve. I was able to take the back off the printer, clear the jam, and get the printer back together without getting annoyed. In the end, I decided that the event was a learning opportunity. I now understand more about how my printer works.

On Saturday, I discovered a great web site to order printer ink from. Laser Monks sell new and refilled cartridges for less than almost anyone else. Plus, the profits go to support the monastery and a few select other charities. So, I ordered four cartridges.

Later in the afternoon I discovered that my printer really wasn't fixed. Every time I tried to print, it would jam again. We purchased the all-in-one printer about eighteen months ago. It was well out of warranty. Plus, I have about four color ink cartridges for it and the four I just ordered. I didn't want the investment in cartridges to go to waste. So, I either wanted the same model printer or another one that used the same cartridges.

I shopped around off-and-on for the rest of the afternoon. Eventually, I stumbled on an all-in-one printer that not only uses the same printer cartridges but has the ability to etch labels directly on to some CDs and DVDs. I had bemoaned the lack of that feature when I made some mix CDs for some friends before the holidays. Plus, I managed to find the printer at a pretty good price from a vendor who I had a $10 coupon for.

Not every potential frustration can be turned around this way. However, I am hopeful that I can truly reduce the negativity in my life a bit at a time.

Best music of 2009 (IMO)

2009-12-31T11:44:00.003-05:00

This list does not include a couple of songs that were officially released in 2008, but had most of their airplay in 2009 (Supermassive Black Hole by Muse being the most painful exclusion). However, there's still some pretty good tuneage here:

Happy New Year, everyone!

The year in review

2009-12-27T08:25:00.002-05:00

My good friend over at Raine's Kitchen posted an upbeat review of her decade. I was so inspired that I thought that I'd follow suit with this review of the year. Later this week, I'll actually do what she did and review the decade.

I could do as she did and just focus on the good stuff. However, life is a balance. I want to review both the good and the bad. Like her, I think there's more good here than bad. That's amazing this year.

The Good Stuff

Goblin was laid off from a job he had grown to hate.
Goblin trained for and got his license as an LNA
I completed a writing seminar online last spring that reminded me how much I love writing.
Goblin got into and started LPN school
Grendel got straight A's for his sophomore year of high school.
Grendel is very active on his FIRST team. He's made some great friends and he's getting a lot out of the experience.
We went to WPI with Grendel for a FIRST competition. We got a really good look at the place and can see why Grendel wants to go to college there.
Grendel got his first job. He didn't stay long, but he used the money to buy his own computer.
I had a fabulous vacation on Star Island. I met some great people, and I committed to go back every summer.
I made a couple of new friends this year. One who promises to re-meet on Star Island this summer.
I earned my CISSP, which makes me professionally more employable and relevant in my field.
I reconnected with lots of friends on Facebook.
Grendel completed driver's education
Goblin's unemployment benefits were extended through the end of the year, possibly into March 2010
Goblin got the H1N1 shot at school because of his new profession.
The basement is looking good.
Grendel had a LAN party in the half-finished basement. Having six additional teenage boys in the house wasn't so bad.
I committed to go to Atlanta with Grendel in April for the national FIRST competition.
Family and friends have been very supportive this year.

--- SPOILER ALERT: Go no further if you want to stay positive ---

The Bad Stuff

Goblin lost his job, which has really hurt us financially.

The worse year for our marriage.

Grendel's grades are all over the place again.

Credit card fraud in November, still arguing over charges with company.

My weight and chronic pain are the worse ever. Menopause has not been kind to me either.

Progress on the basement has been much slower than ever anticipated.

Had to cancel our trip to Europe last spring because of financial issues. We may not get to see my brother in Paris before his tour is over in 2011.

Unemployment will run out sometime this coming year, and then we're in big trouble unless Grendel's flaky per diem work becomes less flaky.

The year really was more good than bad, even if some of the bads really do stink.

The woes of having a credit card

2009-12-05T09:12:00.002-05:00

I just went to review my credit card charges (which I do about once a week). I discovered that nearly $1000 had been charged to my card last weekend in another part of the country.

On Tuesday, I did get a call from a merchant I had purchased something through saying that she couldn't get my credit card to go through. I gave her another form of payment and then called the card company. The idiot I reached at the other end of the phone said that they had locked my account because a charge from Amazon had come in with the incorrect CID #. I told him that was ridiculous, so he unlocked the account. Apparently, the card company had locked the account based on the odd charges from the west coast. But, he could not discern that or communicate that to me.

I was ticked at the time because the reasoning seemed moronic. Plus, when I'd first gotten the card last year they had locked the account with the first purchase I tried to make with it (my iMac). In both instances (last year and this week) the company did not attempt to contact me. I had to call them to ask why the charges weren't going through.

So, now I have to wait two weeks to get my new card. Thirteen months ago I didn't even have a credit card. I was paying for everything with my check card. Now I have two credit cards. The one that was compromised is the one that I use for everything, including recurring bills. The other one I barely use, mostly for car related expenses. Fortunately, I've done most of my holiday shopping already.

What a frustrating situation.

The Credit Card Song - Dick Fe...

We're all Droopy Dog

2009-11-30T21:07:00.002-05:00

Do you remember the cartoon Droopy Dog? His infamous tag line was, "That makes me mad."

The January 2010 Consumer Reports featured a short piece on "Top gripes: What bugs America most." Here are were the top gripes of those surveyed:

Hidden fees
Not getting a human on the phone
Tailgating
Cell-phone use by drivers(1)
Incomprehensible bills
Dog poop
Unreliable Internet service
Discourteous cell-phone use(2)
Waiting for repair people(5)
Spam
Shrunken products
Very slow drivers(4)
Unreliable cell-phone service
Traffic jams(3)

The numbers after a few are my biggest peeves on the list.

Thank you for joining me this NaBloPoMo. It's been fun, but I'm glad it's over. I can now go back to my irregular posting. I hope to post a few times a week, but it may just be weekends again. I do plan to keep up the musical accompaniment.

Don't Worry Be Happy - Bobby M...

Pope canonizes little green man?

2009-11-29T18:20:00.003-05:00

A few weeks ago the Vatican held a 'study week' with "over 30 astronomers, biologists, geologists and religious leaders to discuss the question of the existence of extraterrestrials." In an interview last year, the Vatican's chief astronomer stated:

"Just like there is an abundance of creatures on earth, there could also be other beings, even intelligent ones, that were created by God. That doesn't contradict our faith, because we cannot put boundaries to God's creative freedom. As saint Francis would say, when we consider the earthly creatures to be our "brothers and sisters", why couldn't we also talk about a "extraterrestrial brother"? He would still be part of creation."

If there is intelligent life out there, will they be Catholic? Will they believe that they too were created in God's image? Will they be tolerant of our Catholics' version of worship? I already know the flip side of those questions. Let's hope that ET is better at spiritual charity than we are.

Aliens Exist - blink-182

Black Saturday?

2009-11-28T12:55:00.002-05:00

We had an extra six teen males at our house over night. Most of them were up until 0430. I got up around 0830 and tried to stay somewhat quiet. There was a very animated wind storm going on outside. Around 1030 the power went out. We have multiple UPS devices throughout our house, including in the living room where the guest teens were sprawled. They were all (more or less) awake within fifteen minutes.

The power came back on at exactly noon! So, I only have to make the clocks stop flashing. They all have the correct time. Seems like a conspiracy to me. Maybe someone at the power company thought it would be a little gift to help people correct the time on all their digital clocks?

Hubby did a little Black Friday holiday shopping yesterday, for me. He told me what he bought me when he came home so that I could go pick up an extended warranty on my new digital SLR camera. He got me a Sony, which was the least expensive DSLR that Best Buy had. At first I was squeamish about getting such a pricey gift considering our current financial circumstances. Then I started warming up to it, since I love photography. And then I decided that I would prefer the slightly pricier entry-level Cannon DLSR. We're probably going to go exchange my 'gift' shortly. Should be 'fun'.

Welcome to Black Saturday.

I'm Not Sleeping - Paul Buckma...

Black Friday is usually not my thing

2009-11-27T06:00:00.001-05:00

I normally refuse to participate in the insanity-for-a-bargain that is Black Friday. However, right after this post appears I will be joining the mindless slobbering lemmings in my own personal quest for a bit of savings. The reason? My basement project.

A couple of days ago we realized that we could probably use a new bookcase with slightly smaller dimensions than any of the bookcases we currently have, to optimize the wall space in the new basement living space. Then, low and behold, I got an email from my favorite unfinished wood furniture store: The Mill Store. The email contained a number of great coupons, including a 40% off early bird coupon for Friday morning, good between 5 a.m. and 9 a.m.

Considering the amount of money that we've poured into the basement already, and the fact that Goblin is unemployed, I could use the break on the bookcase. (Really wish I could have gotten it on my desk, which I got 20% off on a few weeks ago. But, I'll take this one too.)

Our musical selection for this post is one of my favorite songs of all time. I definitely feel like one of the Ants Marching by joining this ridiculous tradition of rampant consumerism.

Ants Marching - Dave Matthews ...

Happy Thanksgiving

2009-11-26T09:08:00.000-05:00

Thanksgiving is about alot of things: food, family, parades, football, the beginning of the 'holiday season', and the day before Black Friday (see tomorrow's post). Enjoy the day and take time to remember at least one thing you have to be thankful for.

History of Thanksgiving in the U.S.

Turkey History and Lore

If you're looking for a surprisingly good Thanksgiving movie, check out Dan in Real Life. I'm not a huge Steve Carell fan, so that's saying something. John Mahoney and Diane Wiest are charming as his well-meaning parents, as he struggles to hide the fact that he's fallen in love with his brother (Dan Cook)'s new girlfriend (Juliette Binoche) after years in misery as a widower. Carrel ends up sitting at the kids table to avoid his discomfort during the big dinner. He also loses his driver's license after several stops for speeding during his mesmerization. Highly recommended!

The Thanksgiving Song - Adam S...

The Cult of the Mac

2009-11-25T08:16:00.003-05:00

Over the weekend my husband and I went to the mall on 'the great pointy-toed shoe hunt' ... for him! My friends from college will never let me forget the torture I put them through roaming from one end of Potomac Mills Mall to the other on 'the great brown pump hunt'. So, I definitely deserved being dragged from one shoe store to another (including a few before we even went to the mall).

As we neared the end of our options in Pheasant Lane Mall I turned around and fixed on a blissful (for me) vision: The Apple Store! I had completely forgotten that an Apple Store had opened up in the mall the day before. This was the answer to one of my minor prayers. Not long after I got my beloved iMac last year, the DVD drive bit the dust. I had to drive 35 minutes to Burlington, MA, to take it to the nearest Apple Store for service. Pheasant Lane Mall is much much closer. Plus, I can now stop in regularly to drool over the accessories to my adopted faith.

Faith? Faith, you say? Well, um, yes.

My husband and I had the amusing conversation after I dragged myself out of the Apple Store. (No, he didn't have to drag me out. I was capable of extricating myself, thank you.) We decided that people who buy Macs end up being like cultists. Most Mac users love their Macs. They are obsessed with all things Mac. Their eyes light up whenever they are exposed to new Mac products. They can barely contain themselves as new product releases approach. Why is this?

In the most recent issue of Macworld (I subscribe), they had two little side-by-side pieces that caught my attention. First, 'nearly 12 percent of U.S. computer-owning households now have a Mac.' That's a 3% increase over 2008. 85% of of Mac households also have a Windows PC.

There are probably two factors contributing to that. First, there could be Windows machines that pre-date the Mac in the household. In my house, I only use Windoze on my work laptop. My old intel machines are now Ubuntu systems. Grendel and Goblin are still under the influence of Windoze. Second, some software is still only available under Windows. I still have a Windoze-VM on my Mac for one program. That will end in February, hopefully, when Intuit finally releases an updated version of Quicken for the Mac.

The other article compared adoption of new OS versions by Mac users verses Windows users. Snow Leopard was released late this summer. Within a month of the product's release, 60% of the visitors to the Macworld website had upgraded to Snow Leopard. While the population is somewhat skewed by the type of Mac user examined, that's still pretty impressive. After more than a year on the market, Vista accounts for around 15% of the market. Then again, Vista suffers from the every-second-release-is-a-dud problem that MS seems to have. Maybe Windows 7 will fair better. After all, it only took Windows XP eleven months to surpass Windows 98 installations (as measured by visits to PCWorld.com). Still, one additional factor in the quick adoption rate to Snow Leopard verses any Windoze release could be price tag. Snow Leopard costs less than $30. Windows 7 can be found for that much if your a student; but everyone else has to pony up around $100 for an upgrade.

I have purchased Snow Leopard. I plan to spend part of the long holiday weekend installing it.

Hallelujah - John Cale

Never under estimate the power of human ... anything

2009-11-24T21:04:00.004-05:00

Suppose you thought you had cancer. Suppose you had a son who was in dire straights for money. Suppose you had an insurance policy that was worth quite a bit of money. Would you kill yourself for the insurance money and try to make it look like murder? Why not just wait for the cancer to kill you? Well, maybe you don't want a long gruesome death. Maybe your son needs the money sooner rather than later.

How would you kill yourself so that it wouldn't look like suicide? Maybe a car accident on a mountainous road on a rainy night? No? How about stripping down to your socks, walking into a cemetery, binding your ankles and wrists (the later kind of loosely), writing "FED" on your chest (to make the whole thing look like some redneck hate crime), and then hanging yourself from a tree?

Federal Census worker, Bill Sparkman, should have picked a higher branch to hang himself from. Investigators had several clues that Sparkman's death wasn't a murder. The biggest one was that his knees barely cleared the ground below the branch he was hanging from. If he wanted to live, he just needed to stand up.

Instead of life insurance, maybe Sparkman should have purchased stupidity insurance. (BTW, the autopsy showed that he did not have cancer.)

Don't Try Suicide - Queen

Facebook is for friends, not for investigators, or is it?

2009-11-23T22:03:00.002-05:00

A Canadian woman recently lost her disability benefits that she was receiving for major depression when an insurance investigator found pictures of her on Facebook having a happy vacation and a jovial birthday party.

I'm not posting this to side with the woman or the insurance company. I'm posting this to remind folks, be cautious what you post on social networking sites and lock down who can see what. You definitely don't want your boss seeing wild pictures of you partying. Facebook allows you to limit who gets to see what kind of information from you. Familiarize yourself with those features and use them, while still exercising your common sense.

Private Eyes - Hall & Oates

Odd family bonding time

2009-11-22T19:19:00.004-05:00

My family has slowly been finishing the basement so that my son can move down there and I can take over his room as an office/craft room. This morning Grendel and Goblin were staining some paneling while I rode my exercise bike. We were all in the same space, which is kind of odd for us. Even our younger cat hung out down there with us. I was having such a nice time with them that I stayed on the bike an extra twenty six minutes.

Since Goblin wanted musical accompaniment while he worked, and I'm used to listening to music while I work out downstairs, I hooked up my iPod to my little iPod boombox. We played it on shuffle, and I kept the right to skip songs that just weren't fitting with my workout. That being said, we had an interesting mix of songs particularly considering that the audience was two late 40's parents and a 16 year old. Some families might not have considered the resulting mix totally family-appropriate.

The first song that I noticed that might not have flown in just every household was the Geto Boys' It's Good to be a Gangsta. Check out the lyrics link and you'll see what I mean.

The next song that might have raised an eyebrow or two was Crystal Methods' Name of the Game. For an electronic song, there are a good deal of lyrics. While the song has been used in a commercial or two, the original version is not G-rated. Check out the lyrics link.

While the lyrics on those two songs were bad enough, Goblin misheard the lyrices of one song and had to ask me if he heard it right. "Did he just say 'I want to do you from behind'?" No, no, no. The song is Leave You Far Behind by Lunatic Calm. Grendel agreed that it did sound like Goblin's interpretation was correct.

This is not a new sharing experience. When Grendel was a preschooler, Goblin drove him to daycare a great deal of the time. Sometimes they listened to kid music, sometimes they listened to grown-up tunes. One day, when the three of us were driving around town we were listening to a Third Eye Blind album. Grendel started singling along to Semi-charmed life. After he sang "She comes round and she goes down on me" I looked at Goblin and said that he couldn't listen to that album in the car with Grendel any more. The last thing I wanted was a call from his daycare teacher expressing her dismay at Grendel's musical repertoire.

So, yeah, that's how we spend quality family time.

Leave You Far Behind [Lunatics...

Don't worry ladies, everything will be all right

2009-11-21T09:09:00.003-05:00

Earlier this week, a government task force stated that most women don't need to start having annual mammograms until age 50. And now, the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) says women don't need a PAP every year. Having a PAP every other year is just fine.

How many women have been saved by these tests? How many women in their 40s would die if their insurance companies stopped covering mammograms before age 50?

While the studies show that most cancers can be caught under the new guidelines, what about those that would be missed until it was too late? Don't let the hoopla regarding the less stress, less false positives, and any inconvenience fool you. These findings are about cost effectiveness not about actual health care. How much are the lives of a few women worth I wonder?

Don't Worry Baby - The Beach B...

Unhealthy Women's Health piece

2009-11-20T06:37:00.005-05:00

I subscribe to Women's Health Magazine. Generally, I find the articles to be useful and interesting. However, they ran a piece on The Little Black Dress this month that disturbed me.

Women's Health is not a fashion magazine. It's supposed to be about helping women make healthy choices in their lives. Does this woman look healthy to you?

I plan on contacting the magazine to share my feelings on this. Such images only encourage young women to strive for an unhealthy weight, doing unhealthy things to get there.

Skinny - Filter

World Toilet Day is no joke

2009-11-19T07:54:00.002-05:00

When a friend emailed me that today was World Toilet Day, I thought he was sharing a joke. This is a serious organization attempting to promote sanitation in places where it is scarce. There are millions of people in the world who do not have access to toilets. These people are used to eliminating their wastes in open areas or directly into water supplies that are used for drinking, bathing, and cooking.

While this is a noble cause, it's difficult for me to get behind (er... sorry about that) an organization that wants its supporters to:

At exactly noon on November 19th, gather your family, friends, classmates, colleagues and everyone you know to squat in public for 1 minute in support of World Toilet Day.

This drives home the point "where would you go?" and how people without toilets are forced to go in public places.

Notify the press to attend. Upload a photo of you squatting to encourage others to join.

Mirror In The Bathroom - The E...

Why parents drink

2009-11-18T19:11:00.003-05:00

The following is something my sister-in-law forwarded to me. She felt I might appreciate it after some recent melodrama with Grendel. One of his big arguments with me is that there were worse things he could be doing besides spending five or more hours every day playing video games. Enjoy!

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an Envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Dad..'

With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom, and you.

I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole
winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone.
We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live
nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.

Love, Your Son John

PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a Report card That's in my center desk drawer.

I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.

Parents Just Don't Understand ...

I'll have a Kamakaze and some aspargus

2009-11-17T17:18:00.000-05:00

If you like to drink, but hate the hangover, I hope you like asparagus. Apparently, a compound in asparagus can help the liver metabolize alcohol faster, which may help ward off the effects of a hangover. Hollandaise sauce is optional.

One Bourbon, One Scotch, One B...

Cursing is good for you

2009-11-16T05:13:00.000-05:00

According to the journal NeuroReport dropping an F-bomb or two can make sudden injuries hurt a bit less. Test subjects plunged their hands into icy cold water. One group did it while cursing, the other group said a neutral word. The foul mouthed were able to keep their hands in the icy way for 30 percent longer and reported about half the pain as the clean mouthed. Dr Richard Stephens, author of the study, said, "Cursing can trigger the body's fight-or-flight response, which masks pain." So, go ahead and curse if you feel the need when you get that flu shot I mentioned yesterday.

Hurts So Good - John Mellencam...

Vaccines aren't just for little kids

2009-11-15T20:55:00.005-05:00

According to a recent survey by the National Foundation for Infections Diseases, adults ages 18 to 26 are more clueless about preventable diseases than older adults. The CDC as a recommended schedule for adult immunizations. Among those important for young adults: heapatitus B, tetanus booster, HPV, meningitis, and flue. Here are some of the measures of cluelessness among young adults:

70% don't know that the flu kills more Americans than any other vaccine-preventable disease each year.
55% don't know that the virus that causes chicken pox also causes shingles
51% don't realize that they need a tetanus booster every 10 years
34% believe that the common cold is preventable via a vaccine (um... nope)

From my own misspent youth I can believe these numbers. When you're young you kind of think that you're invulnerable. Other than my annual gynecological exam, I don't think I saw a doctor on a regular basis until I was in my late twenties. And, vaccines? I thought those were for little kids or people traveling overseas.

My husband developed shingles when he was in his early 30's. It was horribly painful for him.

After missing a week's work for the flu in my early 30's, I started seeking out a flu shot every Fall. Got mine this year in mid-September. I haven't gotten the Swine Flu vaccine. I would if the supplies weren't so screwed up.

I think I'm about due for a tetanus booster, come to think of it.

Suck it up, kids. You're not indestructible.

Hit Me With Your Best Shot - P...

Support the STANDUP ACT of 2009 (teen driving safety)

2009-11-14T11:13:00.004-05:00

My son completed Drivers Education recently. In New Hampshire, he cannot get his license until he has logged 40 hours of supervised driving, 10 hours of which must be night time driving. The earliest that he will complete this requirement is early January. More likely it will be the end of February or even March. Once he gets his license, the state of New Hampshire forbids him from having any non-familial passengers in the car for the first six months. Also, he is not allowed to drive (unsupervised) between the hours of 1AM and 5AM (like I'd let that happen anyway).

These are great restrictions. However, Congressmen Tim Bishop (D-NY), Michael Castle (R-DE), and Chris Van Hollen, Jr. (D-MD) do not believe this is enough, since more than 4,000 teenagers died in auto accidents last year. They introduced H.R. 1895: The STANDUP Act. The following is from the Safe Roads 4 Teens site:

States must meet the following requirements under the STANDUP Act:
Three stages of licensing – learner’s permit, intermediate stage, and full licensure – should be used
Age 16 should be the earliest age for entry into the learner’s permit process
Nighttime driving while unsupervised should be restricted during the learner’s permit and intermediate stages, until full licensure at age 18
Driving while using communication devices (cell phone calls, texting) should be prohibited at least until full licensure at age 18
Unrestricted, full licensure should occur no earlier than age 18
Passengers should be restricted – no more than one non-familial passenger under age 21 unless a licensed driver over age 21 is in the vehicle – until full licensure at age 18

Any other requirement adopted by the Secretary of Transportation, such as a minimum duration of 6 months and a minimum of 30 hours of supervised driving for a learner’s permit, may be included
Compliance with the requirements within the first three years after enactment will make states eligible for incentive grants
Three years are provided for states to meet the requirements, after which sanctions are imposed to encourage states to meet the requirements

Regardless of whether this law passes, I like the restrictions for teen drivers and will be adopting them for our son. Sorry, Kiddo, I love you too much to risk your life. I'm sure you'll turn out to be a great driver. But, I need to make sure that you take this privilege and the risk it represents quite seriously.

Drive - Incubus

The Book of Genesis meets Fritz the Cat

2009-11-13T05:28:00.000-05:00

In the 1960's R. Crumb created the cutting edge x-rated comic Fritz the Cat.

After more than four decades building a subversive reputation, Crumb has entered new territory that seems to ideally match his talents by illustrating The Book of Genesis. Remember folks, the Old Testament is full of lust, incest, rape, knowing and begotting.

The cover of the book carries the warning "ADULT SUPERVISION RECOMMENDED FOR MINORS." If you consider the substance of most Biblical tales, you may wonder why straight up print editions don't carry that warning as well.

So, I gotta wonder how the Fundies will feel if they find their teenagers slobbering over this particular tome.

The best musical selection for this post would be Tom Lehrer's "Smut". Sadly, I couldn't find it lala.com or playlist.com. Leave it to YouTube!

"The Blob" coming to an ocean near you

2009-11-12T05:05:00.001-05:00

I thought this was a joke when I first read the blurb in The Week. As reported in The National Geographic instances of "sea-mucus blobs" are on the rise. These phenomena are 'clumbs of living and dead organic matter that aggregate into vast, noxious, gooey masses called mucilage.' (Sounds like the ocean needs some decongestant.)

Sitings of these things were recorded all the way back to the 18th century. However, scientists speculate that rising ocean temperatures are to blame for the increased frequency and size of these bodies. (Quick, someone call Steve McQueen and have him bring his CO2 extinguisher again.) Some can 'stretch for more than 100 miles, often near coastlines and beaches, and can be teeming with harmful viruses and bacteria...'

Blobs can gum up the gills or smother sea life. Swimmers who get caught in blobs can develop nasty rashes.

And, yes, there was even a campy theme song from the movie written by Burt Bacharach:

The Blob - The Five Blobs

Thank you, Veterans!

2009-11-11T08:51:00.002-05:00

This is an especially poignant holiday after the events at Fort Hood last week. Please thank a veteran or soldier for their service.

Move over Sarah Palin

2009-11-10T05:53:00.002-05:00

Liz Cheney, former Vice President Dick Cheney's eldest daughter, recently announced the creation of a new conservative group: Keep America Safe. Cheney's group asserts that President Obama should 'stop raising the white flag of surrender to terrorists'. The mission of this group is :

...to provide information for concerned Americans about critical national security issues. Keep America Safe seeks to influence public policy by encouraging dialogue between American citizens and their elected representatives in order to produce legislation and executive action that enhances the national security of the United States.

Cheney is a former State Department official who has been making the rounds on cable television defending her father's post-VP statements and the Bush administration's policies, while attacking the Obama administration. Some postulate that the organization's conservative platform on national security is a springboard for Cheney's own political aspirations which may come to fruition with a Senate bid in Virginia. Kathleen Parker of the Washington Post has dubbed Cheney a "red state rock star."

Michelle Cottle of The New Republic says, "Liz Cheney is a particularly dangerous combination of sweet-as-sugar looks and savage instincts."

Geez. And we thought Sarah Palin was bad.

Maneater - Hall & Oates

Even Baby Einstein rots your toddler's brain?

2009-11-09T15:25:00.003-05:00

Loads of parents out there, including some I know, swear by their Baby Einstein DVDs. In 2006, the Boston-based In 2006, the Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood (CCFC) complained about Disney's use of the word "educational" in the series' marketing materials. When Disney complied and dropped the word, CCFC made rumblings about filing a class action law suit against Disney for misleading parents into buying the DVDs after a research group out of Washington University published a study claiming that infants exposed to the DVDs actually knew 10% fewer words than children not exposed to the DVDs.

CCFC has claimed victory now that Disney is offering purchasers a refund of up to $15.99 per Baby Einstein DVD purchased. However, this is not a new refund. The company has had this refund option in place since the beginning of the product line. Baby Einstein says that they have always stood behind their product with a money-back guarantee.

By the way, the Washington University study didn't target just Baby Einstein DVDs. It encompassed ANY supposedly 'education' vidutainment product aimed at toddlers and infants. So, guess what, the American Academy of Pediatrics had a point. Prolonged exposure to vidutainment for children of any age impedes intellectual growth.

Duh. However, two career families can take heart. Allowing your children to enjoy visual entertainment for limited periods of time (so you can decompress, make dinner, do laundry, etc.) As long as you interact with your children (perhaps sit down with them and read a book) on a regular basis, they probably still have a chance at Harvard.

Couldn't make up my mind for a theme song for this post, so you get two:

And The Cradle Will Rock... - ...

The Future's So Bright, I Gott...

If Supersize Me didn't do it for you

2009-11-08T08:59:00.000-05:00

The New York Times recently reported that most prepackaged ground beef and hamburger patties is a mish mash of meat grades from multiple slaughter houses containing heavily treated fatty scraps and trimmings, sometimes tainted with bovine feces. Most meat processors do not even test each batch for E. coli for final packaging and shipping.

Quarter pounder anyone?

Junk Food Junkie - Larry Groce

Celebrities gagged on Twitter and Facebook?

2009-11-07T08:17:00.000-05:00

Apparently, Hollywood is adding clauses to movie contracts regarding social networking (particularly Facebook and Twitter). There are non-disclosure clauses regarding the plots and on-set happenings on major motion pictures now. Just ask Mike Myers and Cameron Diaz.

Come on folks! What else would we want to hear tweeted from celebrities. Certainly not what they had for breakfast.

As an aside, my favorite celebrity to follow on Twitter is Zane Lamprey from FLN's "Three Sheets". The guy is wickedly funny on his show and in his tweets.

BTW, this is a great cover of the 1980's Wham hit:

Careless Whisper - Seether

Shakespeare unearthed ... with drool

2009-11-06T05:21:00.001-05:00

I enjoy Shakespeare's work. I've seen virtually every film adaption of his plays. Now, a little produced work is going to be filmed with one of my favorite actors. Gerard Butler has agreed to costar in Coriolanus

Yes, he and co-star Ralph Fiennes will probably die by the end of the film, since it's a tragedy. But, I'll be riveted until they keel over.

You Sexy Thing (Single Version...

Another extension on unemployment ... please???

2009-11-05T04:58:00.001-05:00

Looks like the Senate has voted to extend unemployment benefits another 14 weeks beyond the end of the year. New Hampshire's jobless rate (7.2%) means we won't qualify for the 20 week extension (available for states w/8.5% or higher). But, hey, we'll take the 14 weeks.

Hubby is in school full time now, chasing a career as an LPN. He works part time as an LNA. He could work full time and go to school full time. However, it's hard to juggle shifts around the school schedule. Even so, there are few full time positions for LNA's. Most are per diem jobs, like his.

Unemployment is just a bit more than what he makes part time. So, most weeks he gets a pay check and an unemployment check. While neither is much, we'll definitely feel the bite come April when the benefits run out... Unless, they extend the benefits yet again. We're already in record-setting territory on extensions to benefits at this point. I guess we've exceeded all down turns now except for The Great Depression, huh?

Money (That's What I Want) - F...