Tuesday, February 12, 2008

I am not a prude

My son got in trouble with us this evening. (Shocking, a fourteen year old who ticks off his parents!)

K must ask for Internet access since he is really good at pissing away hours when he should be doing other things (like homework or sleeping). This evening, he needed to do some research for a Civics assignment. We caught him "taking a break" playing an online game. So, I re-enabled the proxy server on my linux box and configured his browser to point to the proxy server. I then configured the proxy to block several game sites and his favorite instant messaging sites.

After he went to bed, I decided to check the logs to see if he wasted any more research time with baloney. Shockingly, he did. He ended up going to a porn/game site. Wow! The best of both worlds! Naked women and games.

Frankly, I don't care if he wants to look at naked women. I just want him to get his school work done. However, I also do not want him infecting his computer with malware. Most porn sites give your computer the gift that keeps on giving.

So, after I made my discovery, I woke the kid up. I offered to buy him all the porn magazines his hormones could possibly want. I strongly encouraged him to not surf porn sites on the Internet. I then asked him if he remembered what I do for a living. He sleepily said "computer stuff". I chuckled and responded, "Yeah, kind of." I then proceeded to point out to him that I spend a good portion of my working day dealing with the fallout on our network and computing systems from morons who thought that visiting one or two porn sites was a harmless little lunch time activity. I then re-offered to purchase him some skin magazines. He said that it wasn't necessary. I think it is. Really. I would much rather give him all sorts of naked girls to look at, so long as it doesn't make his computer dysfunctional.

Aren't I a liberal-minded mom?


briwei said...

Dang. That boy needs to pay better attention; "computer stuff". Well, it is good that you do what you do so that you could proxy his stuff and handle the situation.

And I think it is perfectly reasonable to offer to buy his porn for him. I must be liberal minded, too. ;-)

Kitten Herder said...

Early this morning, I order him eight special issues of Playboy. I am also looking at getting him a few of the "Girls Gone Wild" DVDs. My husband is very excited about the prospect of having those in the house. So, I guess I get to make two of them happy at once. ... Um... happy Valentines Day?

barbie2be said...

you know, i see nothing wrong with providing the boy some skin mags. it is better thank getting god knows what from the websites.

i am SO not a prude..... ;)

Cobwebs said...

Are you sure you didn't just embarrass the crap out of him? Teens generally aren't terribly comfortable discussing porn with their parents.

And I wouldn't be terribly surprised if you catch him looking at stuff on the computer again anyway. One, you can find stuff online that's a lot more hard-core than Playboy. Two, it's forbidden fruit. The forbidden is always more enticing.

Summer said...

Boy, I am so computer stupid, I have no idea all the stuf you were talking about. My son spends a lot of time on the puter also and I'm sure he's visited some sites although we haven't seen evidence as far as a virus goes. I would have blasted his ass out of bed too. I'm not sure about buying the porn though. Have to think about that one.

changejunkie said...

He's at the age where he needs some privacy, and that includes from you. If you want provide him with skin mags (although these aren't really porn), have his dad give them to him. There really are things he just can't share with you, and really, that's a healthy developmental milestone. I know it's hard. We just recently entered the phase where I make loud thumping sounds on the stairs going up to our son's room, knock and wait for him to ask me in. He also washes his own sheets and blankets (per his request). We do talk, and we do share all kinds of things, but discussions about his body, naked people, etc. make him horribly uncomfortable and are best handled in a guy-to-guy talk with his dad. I handle the "relationship" questions, the boyfriend-girlfriend, what are girls thinking, end of things.

Paris-bound said...

Oh the humiliation! Caught surfing by your dad? Annoying. By mom, and confronted? Mortifying!

And I agree with changejunkie...getting skin mags from mom is just kinda weird, despite the popularity-enhancing effect to be enjoyed once these precious assets become known to his peer group. Let dad be the purveyor, or better yet leave a gap in the proverbial firewall where he can get to the goods (parentally screened for taste of course) himself without feeling like he's on nudie shot welfare. E.g., suitable bscription for Dad which is carelessly guarded.

Kitten Herder said...

Yeah, I realized the awkwardness of the confrontation after the fact. I knee-jerked (considering this is the kind of crud I deal with at the office on a semi-regular basis).

When the mags come, Dad will hand them over. Also, Dad has agreed to be the provider of videos. Perhaps even some much-prized Jenna Jameson, who we just watched an "E" special on the other night. Surprisingly, she is not the twit I thought porn stars must be.